Le Coeur A Ses Raisons (The Heart Has Its Reasons)
Front cover of Le Coeur A Ses Raisons
(with author's name removed).
Author Name Withheld 2
Date 4 May 1995 (publ.)
Rating/Warning Category:PG-Rated Fan Fiction
Format Novel
Previous Be My Valentine
Archive Location

Le Coeur A Ses Raisons (The Heart Has Its Reasons) is a Forever Knight fanzine novel by Name Withheld 2. Written before "A More Permanent Hell", it includes an alternative origin story for LaCroix.


Nick is profoundly concerned when Lacroix's master, Lydia, comes to Toronto. In his experience, her idiosyncratic morality and love of mischief always leads to trouble. This seems borne out when she saves Natalie from a rapist but makes her forget that Nick is a vampire. What he does not realize is that Lydia is deeply worried about him/


  • 1995 (May) - Le Coeur A Ses Raisons (The Heart Has Its Reasons)

The first printing (of 30 copies) was by September Star Enterprises. All subsequent printing and distribution was by Nansi Casad of Intertwined Press.

The first draft of the story was completed in October 1994; the print zine was published in 1995.

Comments on the StoryEdit

  • Another summary: "A sequel (of sorts) to "Be My Valentine," written *before* "A More Permanent Hell." Natalie is stripped of her memories of Nick's true nature by a mysterious stranger. There is only one vampire with the power to rearrange human minds so effectively, a far more dangerous adversary than LaCroix could ever be -- the very being who made LaCroix what he is. Has she come to help Nick ... or destroy him?! PG-13, with tasteful vampire love scenes." (from The Dark Side of the Glass)

Author's Disclaimer and Notes on the FanzineEdit


This is an absolutely profitless and potential senseless venture, produced during endless sleepless nights, moonlit walks and midnight subway rides, for no apparent reason other than love, by Jamie Melody Randell, and is not intended to infringe on any copyrights held by anyone other than myself. (Lydia, Lydia Chase & Ishtar of Lydia [copyright symbol] 1995 Jamie Melody Randell). I would mention the name of the production company whose copyrights I am not intending to infringe upon, but see, I have this, um, memory impairment, and uhhhhh. I forgot.

No vampires were harmed during the the production of this fanzine.

Sometimes, when I'm bored , or feeling edgy, I like to go out and take a ride on the New York City subways. Not the safest (thing in the world for a young blonde female to do... but I wear my long black cape and my fangs, and people tend to give me a wide berth. Even in New York, folks tend to be leery of things they don't understand, and I have always been incomprehensible.

Walking around Manhattan at night, weaving my way through the late evening crowds of businesspeople and tourists and nightcrawlers on the prowl, I have come to the firm opinion that if vampires exist anywhere, it is here. New York is an ideal haven for all sorts of creatures of the night, be they rock stars, or drug dealers, or simply restless young writers seeking inspiration. Midtown belongs to the business world, mostly, but down below 14th Street, weirdness takes over, and fangs are the least of the oddities one might witness. And further downtown, way south in the financial district, the streets are so narrow and the buildings so tall that you can walk around in broad daylight and never feel the sunlight strike your skin...

Spend enough time in NYC and it soaks into your veins, remakes you as certainly as a vampire's bite. Walk the 'mean streets' at night, and you can feel the beat of the city's pulse throbbing inside you. And on just the right full-moon summer night, it seems as if anything is possible...

They're out there; I just know it. I'm still looking - and if I come across any kindred spirits, I'll be sure to let you know. Cheers!

Notes on LydiaEdit

Lacroix's master, Lydia (or Leda), is similar in many ways to Divia: young, blonde, seemingly innocent, extremely dangerous. In other ways, however, her origin story resembles that of Chelsea Quinn Yarbro's vampire here, Saint-Germain. Some four thousand years old, she comes from a small Mesopotamian civilization unknown to modern archaeology, and was brought across to be her people's moon goddess. (The one who had brought her across "went into the fire", tired "as [she] is now".) This is described twice in the story:

I can tell you, I don't have any particular liking for most of your kind. Bloodthirsty creatures, the lot of you. When I was created, back at the very dawn of humanity, I was a goddess of the moon, of the night. I helped my people, I protected them, and they paid me tribute willingly, gladly." She drew a slender hand across her eyes, as if to banish her vision of the past. "Then one day the invaders came and tore our tribe apart, and I was alone. So I voyaged afar, looking for others of my kind -- and what I found sickened me."

"Actually, I was born in Mesopotamia... somewhere. Keep in mind that I was only barely adolescent when I was brought over," she said, "to be the new 'goddess' of my people. We didn't leave many traces for the archaeologists to find; there's no written history for me to fall back on. I only know that I served as goddess and guardian for several hundred years, until the invaders came to my people's lands and massacred the only way of life I'd ever known." Her expression was pensive, abstracted. "That was... traumatic, to say the least. For a long while, I was a mindless thing, taking one victim after another without reason, wanting nothing more than a continual supply of mortal blood to assuage the pain." Abruptly, she returned to the present, focusing on Nick's face as an anchor against the old memories. "I don't remember much of what happened to me before, oh, twenty-seven hundred bee cee or so. I remember virtually nothing of my mortal life; it's as if I was never anything other than what I am now."

One consequence of Lydia's age is considerable ability to read minds, and not only through direct blood-drinking.

In Lydia's mind, Nick's morals are wrong-headed but better than none. She herself kills to protect the weak, and hunts by using herself as bait. There is a parallel to be seen here with the mission that Vachon is given by the South American vampire that brought him over.


  • She was just a little slip of a thing, small and slender, with an open, engaging face. Barely eighteen, if he was any judge. Hard to imagine this sweet-faced child presenting any danger. [...] She gazed up at him plaintively, huge blue eyes apologetic, without the faintest trace of feminine wiles to mar the effect of complete innocence.
  • "I don't tolerate the victimization of the weak by the strong," she said stridently. "So I use my strength to compensate for mortal weakness."
  • "I am the force which has driven him to the extremes he so favors, and you so despise. It's my doing that Lucien has become what he is -- and so, by extension, you are to some degree my child as well as his." Her sadness lifted abruptly, replaced by a wickedly mischievous grin. "A cute kid, at that," she said whimsically.
  • "Lucien LaCroix," she said softly, sadly. "The light of the cross. I was the one who extinguished that light, Nicholas. I snatched it away, took all the light for myself, and left him only darkness."
  • "What are vampires," Lydia asked reasonably, "but humans with odd dietary needs?"

See alsoEdit

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